AJ Omalley's blog

Benjamin and Dennis

Sarah Rimshot couldn’t tell Benjamin and Dennis apart so she always dressed them differently. Dennis got used to it.

Diancha

Diancha was unaware that her impish brother lurked behind her. She would learn that day that storing her extra marbles in her mouth was unwise.

Her brother would also learn two new ways to remove flaming underwear without burning his toes.

Yossep, (not pictured) was not there.

Gerald "Buffy" Hute

Gerald "Buffy" Hute seemed very studious. When confronted though, he admitted that he never read any of the chemistry books; he just looked at the pictures. They made him Dean of the College.

Route and Sorbell

Actually Route and Sorbell weren’t real twins at all. Route actually was left on our street by gypsies and Mom said she didn’t know where Sorbell came from. But they always dressed alike and neither one of them could pronounce “billfold” correctly.

Eugenia's Dark Past

Eugenia was disappointed to discover that her well-kept secret was well-kept because no one really wanted to know. Sometime later she bought a tennis ball.

Gloria

Gloria always wore a disguise when going to the post office because...well, because!

Honor Knightly

This is thought to be the only surviving picture of Honor Knightly (aka “Satin”) the elusive department store heiress and stenographer for the Kairian Luncheon Club. Thorne Smith thought very highly of her but she still faded into obscurity behind Cosmo Topper and the ghost-dog, Neil.

She was quite fond of changing clothes and of gentlemen standing in doorways to avoid the rain. (That’s for those of you who read.) Honor became known as a fashion-plate and clothes horse to those who knew her at the shelter. She spent most of her leisure time, which was most of her time, removing address labels from subscription magazines and learning French Toast.

She worked part time as a lab assistant at a sperm bank but was fired eventually for combining specimens to save space. “They all look the same!” The sperm bank gave her a handsome “retirement” package on the condition that she would not discuss her employment with anyone.

Her father, department store tycoon and co-inventor of knee-high panty-hose, left her a comfortable income. Not needing to work for a living then, she was able to spend most of her time with her first love, trying on hats at the local charity shop.

Late in life she bought a very rural home on the plains in western America and lived well into this century. From her home, she managed a successful business selling thousands of prairie dogs on EBay, believing them to be chinchillas. While she often had to refund the original purchase price to disappointed (and surprised) EBay customers, she amassed a fortune in deposit interest at a small local bank where the funds were temporarily held.

Being rich, she of course died under very mysterious circumstances. Controversy surrounded the local coroner’s report which stated Honor died of prolonged exposure to boredom. After the conspiracy theories began to dim, the coroner was seen wearing Honor’s socks and the whole furor started up again. Rumors persist to this day (nearly a month later) that she is one of the three people buried at Fort Sumner in William H. Bonney’s grave. (Source: Wackipedia (King Jake's edition), page four or five.)

“Sindy” (far right) had just taken the year’s cross-dressing championships at Fort Worth. “Sindy” was a stage name. Her real name has no vowels. Hazel, second from right, embarrassed about her “condition” hid behind Blanch and “Sindy” so only her face would show for the camera. Coleman, remaining in the shadows, was weary of the big city life and moved to an island in the Pacific Ocean. She soon tired of that when the US navy anchored their entire fleet at a harbor on the other side of the island. Toulouse, third from left, swallowed a live frog once but never told anyone.

Even though the plate in Bevan's left shoulder always pointed north, he was always lost.